Shyambajuz: Harder, Browner, Faster, Stronger

Now that Shyam knows about www.shyambajuz.com (not affiliated with Shyam P.), what next?  I ask you, fellow guilty parties, where do we go from here?

Welcome to Shyambajuz 2.0…

Welcome to the future!

or was it the past… I can’t remember… anyways YOU’VE BEEN SHYAMROLLED BABY!!!

Note: Content supplied by Karli, editted by Jon

Pornstar since the tender age of 12… oh wait.. you’re saying that was last week.. doh!

Jabba says: neekaa chee daww wannaa SOLO HO HO HO HO HO

Who is that stunningly attractive asian man in the back ground… I’m not sure… but he smells like he’s from Oregon.

Shyam, SIT STILL!

Mr. Kunishima.. I’m sorry.. you can blame your daughters.

But.. YOU WORK THAT BATHROBE!

Hahaha I want to party with that guy over there!

Shyam Imposter

So Shyam Patel is super human or whatever, but did you know he has a weakness?  If you want to see Shyam’s eyes light up, utter the phrase “crack mocha*” and see what happens.

No really, try it.

Done?

Okay, so did he start drooling instantaneously?  Also did you note his swift move towards Cafe Strada or the Free Speech Movement Cafe?

Good.

I’m not sure if Shyam coined the term himself, but really the origin is unimportant because I just handed you the key to his caffeine adoring heart.

Say it once more, with feeling, “crack mocha.”

The end.

Other Shyam kryptonite includes: Jill K., chocolate, Cal football, and Obama

*Crack Mocha= luscious, creamy, fatty white chocolate infused hot mocha….mmmmmmmmm

1. One must wear a proper lab coat that hasn’t been washed since last year. This protects your fashionable clothes from toxic chemicals and other contaminants. Note that the coat need not be buttoned.

2. Gloves are a protection against contamination of precious samples… and also provide an extra layer of protection for your delicate skin against possible accidents.

3. Remember that authorized user access to the laboratory is enforced on a 24 hour basis. Any suspicious persons entering the laboratory without proper ID will be subject to harassment by random (fat and angry) security personnel. Note that unfettered use of gloves on door handles is totally acceptable.

4. Before starting any work with cells or animal tissue, please remember to spray down your gloves with 70% ethanol. Proper spraying technique is required.

5. Two essential steps for collection of your cells or sample with the centrifuge:

(1) Please balance your sample with a random tube of unidentified liquid that is laying around the lab.

(2) A prayer before starting the centrifuge is required to ensure proper spinning of the centrifuge. If the centrifuge faults anyway, you may try a curse instead. Results not guaranteed either way.

Follow the Shyambajuz Laboratory Safety Guide and your experiments are guaranteed to succeed!

Not really about Shyam, but relevant none-the-less. Michelle made Honor/No Honor Hat.

HONOR!

NO HONOR!

NanoBrew has made beer three times. Each time, we eagerly await Shyam’s arrival. Each time, we are sorely disappointed.

Beer 1: The English BROWN Ale. It was the new awesome. But apparently not brown enough for Shyam.

Beer 2: The Irish Stout. It was STRONGER than the brown. But apparently not strong enough for Shyam.

Beer 3: The Blonde Ale. This brewed FASTER than either the others. But apparently not fast enough for Shyam.

Tell us Shyam, tell us! What is required of us for you to partake of our NanoBrew?? Would you be happy with a HARD apple cider? Would it be hard enough? Or an INDIAN Pale Ale? Or would that be too pale?

Not really related to Shyam… but he is Indian… so he has to love this

Meow?